Couples Therapy in the
Bay Area
For couples who love each other but feel miles apart. Helping you move from polite conversations and disconnection to feeling safe, close, and truly understood.
When love gets buried under silence, busyness, and careful conversations...
You love each other — but work, kids, and life keep getting in the way.
Days slip by, and you realize you haven’t really connected in weeks.
Frequent Arguments and Miscommunication
Maybe you’ve tried talking things through before, but it only led to more hurt, misunderstanding, or shutdowns.
So now, it feels safer not to bring things up at all.
Disconnection
You love each other — but work, kids, and life keep getting in the way.
Days slip by, and you realize you haven’t really connected in weeks.
Emotional Distance
The conversations stay polite, but there’s an ache underneath — a fear that you’re drifting further apart.
You don’t want to give up. But you’re not sure how to find your way back to each other.
When keeping the peace starts to feel like losing each other…
You function well together. The laundry gets done, the kids are fed, the calendar is managed. You’re a great team. But something deeper is missing.
You avoid the hard conversations, not because you don’t care, but because they rarely lead anywhere good.
One of you feels dismissed.
The other feels blamed.
And both of you walk away feeling further apart.
So you stop bringing things up.
You stay “okay.”
You go through the motions.
But underneath that steady rhythm is a quiet grief and the sense that you’re not really seeing or being seen by each other anymore.
You start to wonder: Is this all there is?
And if you’re wired differently, whether that’s due to neurodivergence, emotional needs, or communication styles, it can feel even harder to bridge the gap. You love each other, but it’s like you’re speaking different languages.
That’s where our work begins.
Therapy that honors who you are as individuals and as a couple.
I don’t believe in one-size-fits-all solutions. Every couple brings their own story, wiring, and way of connecting.
Maybe one of you needs lots of words to feel close.
Maybe the other prefers space and silence to process.
Maybe one of you is highly sensitive, and the other more logical or pragmatic.
Maybe you’ve wondered if you just experience the world differently and don’t know how to meet each other there.
In our work, we slow down enough to really see each of you, not just as “the partner,” but as a full human with your own nervous system, needs, and way of making meaning.
We make room for both of your experiences to matter.
You’ll begin to understand how your differences aren’t the problem, it’s the lack of language, safety, and tools to navigate them that creates distance.
Together, we’ll build that language.
So you can feel heard without having to shout.
So your partner understands you, not just intellectually, but emotionally.
So your relationship becomes a place where both of you feel safe, known, and supported.
“To truly love we must learn to mix various ingredients—care, affection, recognition, respect, commitment, and trust, as well as honest and open communication.”
— bell hooks
Hi, I’m Sarah (she/her). I help couples move from disconnection and distance into relationships that feel emotionally safe, vibrant, and connected.
My approach is warm, collaborative, and grounded in deep emotional work. I draw from Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy, somatic practices, and practical communication tools to help you shift out of painful patterns and into moments of genuine connection.
I’ll never just hand you a list of communication tips and send you on your way. Instead, I help you slow down, feel safe enough to speak honestly, and begin to understand what’s really happening beneath the surface.
We’ll explore the emotions, needs, and protective patterns driving your relationship dynamics, not just what you argue about, but why it keeps happening.
We’ll also pay attention to what’s happening in your body. Those moments when you freeze, shut down, or feel overwhelmed, because healing happens when your nervous system feels safe and supported.
I help each of you feel truly seen as individuals, while also strengthening the bond between you.
My Approach
Together, we’ll:
Understand the cycle that keeps you stuck and how to shift it
Learn to communicate in ways that feel more natural, respectful, and emotionally connected
Honor your differences and find new ways to meet each other with compassion
This isn’t about fixing you or your partner.
It’s about creating a relationship that feels alive, honest, and safe to be yourself in.
Share and feel heard, even with the vulnerable stuff
Navigate tough conversations without spiraling into conflict or shutting down
Understand each other’s emotional needs and inner experiences
Rebuild connection, trust, and emotional safety even when life feels messy
Imagine:
Feeling like true partners again, safe, seen, and emotionally close
Having the words to talk about anything without fear of shutdowns or fights
Feeling confident in your relationship and how you navigate the hard moments
Coming home to a relationship that feels like a refuge, not a source of stress
In our work together, you’ll learn how to:
If you’ve tried therapy before and it didn’t help...
Many couples I work with have had experiences where therapy felt overwhelming, surface-level, or even made things worse.
Maybe it felt like someone was keeping score.
Maybe it stayed in your head and never reached your heart.
Maybe it focused on communication “tips” without touching the deeper emotional patterns underneath.
That’s not how I work.
I focus on emotional safety, nervous system awareness, and helping each of you feel truly understood without pressure, without blame.
This isn’t about pushing through conflict.
It’s about learning how to turn toward each other with honesty, compassion, and curiosity.
Therapy with me isn’t about fixing your relationship like a broken appliance.
It’s about slowing down enough to understand what’s actually happening underneath the frustration, the silence, the distance.
It’s about creating a space where both of you can breathe again.
Where you can speak without being interrupted or corrected.
Where you can listen without feeling attacked.
Where you can start remembering why you chose each other in the first place.
We’ll move at a pace that honors your nervous systems and emotional readiness, one step at a time, toward connection.
What it feels like to work with me
As trust rebuilds, something begins to shift.
Moments that once spiraled into arguments start to feel softer.
You begin to see each other with new eyes—not as opponents, but as partners on the same team.
You start to feel safe enough to reach for one another again, even when it’s hard.
Laughter returns in small ways. Touch feels less tentative.
You begin to believe that repair is possible and that love can deepen through honesty, not in spite of it.
This might be a good fit if:
You love your partner but feel emotionally disconnected
You want to stop walking on eggshells and start having real conversations
You're both willing to explore new ways of relating, even if it feels scary
It might not be the right fit if:
You’re looking for a quick fix without deeper emotional work
You’re not open to looking at your own role in relationship patterns
The truth?
Even couples who deeply love each other can feel lost sometimes. You don’t have to keep figuring this out on your own.
If you’re ready to reconnect, feel understood, and build a relationship that feels alive and secure again — I’d love to help.
Is couples therapy right for you?
